Speech Of Chetan Bhagat

Good
Morning everyone and thank you for giving me this chance to speak to
you. This day is about you. You, who have come to this college, leaving
the comfort of your homes (or in some cases discomfort), to become
something in your life. I am sure you are excited. There are few days
in human life when one is truly elated. The first day in college is one
of them. When you were getting ready today, you felt a tingling in your
stomach. What would the auditorium be like, what would the teachers be
like, who are my new classmates - there is so much to be curious about.
I call this excitement, the spark within you that makes you feel truly
alive today. Today I am going to talk about keeping the spark shining.
Or to put it another way, how to be happy most, if not all the time.
Where
do these sparks start? I think we are born with them. My 3-year old
twin boys have a million sparks. A little Spiderman toy can make them
jump on the bed. They get thrills from creaky swings in the park. A
story from daddy gets them excited. They do a daily countdown for
birthday party â€" several months in advance â€" just for the day they
will cut their own birthday cake.
I see students like you, and I still see some sparks. But when I see older people, the spark is difficult to find. That means as we age, the spark fades.
People whose spark has faded too much are dull, dejected, aimless and
bitter. Remember Kareena in the first half of Jab We Met vs the second
half? That is what happens when the spark is lost. So how to save the
spark?
Imagine the spark to be a lamp's flame. The first aspect is
nurturing - to give your spark the fuel, continuously. The second is to
guard against storms.
To
nurture, always have goals. It is human nature to strive, improve and
achieve full potential. In fact, that is success. It is what is
possible for you. It isn't any external measure - a certain cost to
company pay package, a particular car or house.
Most of us are
from middle class families. To us, having material landmarks is success
and rightly so. When you have grown up where money constraints force
everyday choices, financial freedom is a big achievement. But it isn't
the purpose of life. If that was the case, Mr. Ambani would not show up
for work. Shah Rukh Khan would stay at home and not dance anymore.
Steve Jobs won't be working hard to make a better iPhone, as he sold
Pixar for billions of dollars already. Why do they do it? What makes
them come to work everyday? They do it because it makes them happy.
They do it because it makes them feel alive. Just getting better from current levels feels good. If
you study hard, you can improve your rank. If you make an effort to
interact with people, you will do better in interviews. If you
practice, your cricket will get better. You may also know that you
cannot become Tendulkar, yet. But you can get to the next level.
Striving for that next level is important.
Nature designed with a
random set of genes and circumstances in which we were born. To be
happy, we have to accept it and make the most of nature's design. Are
you? Goals will help you do that. I must add, don't just have career or
academic goals. Set goals to give you a balanced, successful life. I
use the word balanced before successful. Balanced means ensuring your
health, relationships, mental peace are all in good order.
There
is no point of getting a promotion on the day of your breakup. There is
no fun in driving a car if your back hurts. Shopping is not enjoyable
if your mind is full of tensions.
You must have read some quotes - Life is a tough race, it is a marathon or whatever. No, from what I have seen so far,
life is one of those races in nursery school, where you have to run
with a marble in a spoon kept in your mouth. If the marble falls, there
is no point coming first.
Same with life, where health and relationships are the marble. Your
striving is only worth it if there is harmony in your life. Else, you
may achieve the success, but this spark, this feeling of being excited
and alive, will start to die.
One
last thing about nurturing the spark - don't take life seriously. One
of my yoga teachers used to make students laugh during classes. One
student asked him if these jokes would take away something from the
yoga practice. The teacher said - don't be serious, be sincere.
This quote has defined my work ever since. Whether its my writing, my
job, my relationships or any of my goals. I get thousands of opinions
on my writing everyday. There is heaps of praise, there is intense
criticism. If I take it all seriously, how will I write? Or rather, how
will I live? Life is not to be taken seriously, as we are really
temporary here. We are like a pre-paid card with limited validity. If
we are lucky, we may last another 50 years. And 50 years is just 2,500
weekends. Do we really need to get so worked up? It's ok, bunk a few
classes, goof up a few interviews, fall in love. We are people, not
programmed devices.
I've
told you three things - reasonable goals, balance and not taking it too
seriously that will nurture the spark. However, there are four storms
in life that will threaten to completely put out the flame. These must
be guarded against. These are disappointment, frustration, unfairness
and loneliness of purpose.
Disappointment
will come when your effort does not give you the expected return. If
things don't go as planned or if you face failure. Failure is extremely
difficult to handle, but those that do come out stronger. What did this
failure teach me? is the question you will need to ask. You will feel
miserable. You will want to quit, like I wanted to when nine publishers
rejected my first book. Some IITians kill themselves over low grades
â€" how silly is that? But that is how much failure can hurt you. But
it's life. If challenges could always be overcome, they would cease to be a challenge. And remember - if you are failing at something, that means you are at your limit or potential. And that's where you want to be.
Disappointment'
s cousin is frustration, the second storm. Have you ever been
frustrated? It happens when things are stuck. This is especially
relevant in India. From traffic jams to getting that job you deserve,
sometimes things take so long that you don't know if you chose the
right goal. After books, I set the goal of writing for Bollywood, as I
thought they needed writers. I am called extremely lucky, but it took
me five years to get close to a release. Frustration saps excitement,
and turns your initial energy into something negative, making you a
bitter person. How did I deal with it? A realistic assessment of the
time involved â€" movies take a long time to make even though they are
watched quickly, seeking a certain enjoyment in the process rather than the end result
â€" at least I was learning how to write scripts, having a side plan
â€" I had my third book to write and even something as simple as
pleasurable distractions in your life - friends, food, travel can help
you overcome it. Remember, nothing is to be taken seriously.
Frustration is a sign somewhere, you took it too seriously.
Unfairness
- this is hardest to deal with, but unfortunately that is how our
country works. People with connections, rich dads, beautiful faces,
pedigree find it easier to make it â€" not just in Bollywood, but
everywhere. And sometimes it is just plain luck. There are so few
opportunities in India, so many stars need to be aligned for you to
make it happen. Merit and hard work is not always linked to achievement
in the short term, but the long term correlation is high, and
ultimately things do work out. But realize, there will be some people
luckier than you. In fact, to have an opportunity to go to college and
understand this speech in English means you are pretty damm lucky by
Indian standards. Let's be grateful for what we have and get the
strength to accept what we don't. I have so much love from my readers
that other writers cannot even imagine it. However, I don't get
literary praise. It's ok. I don't look like Aishwarya Rai, but I have
two boys who I think are more beautiful than her. It's ok. Don't let
unfairness kill your spark.
Finally,
the last point that can kill your spark is isolation. As you grow older
you will realize you are unique. When you are little, all kids want Ice
cream and Spiderman. As you grow older to college, you still are a lot
like your friends. But ten years later and you realize you are unique.
What you want, what you believe in, what makes you feel, may be
different from even the people closest to you. This can create conflict
as your goals may not match with others. . And you may drop some of
them. Basketball captains in college invariably stop playing basketball
by the time they have their second child. They give up something that
meant so much to them. They do it for their family. But in doing that,
the spark dies. Never, ever make that compromise. Love yourself first,
and then others.
There you go. I've told you the four
thunderstorms - disappointment, frustration, unfairness and isolation.
You cannot avoid them, as like the monsoon they will come into your
life at regular intervals. You just need to keep the raincoat handy to
not let the spark die.
I
welcome you again to the most wonderful years of your life. If someone
gave me the choice to go back in time, I will surely choose college.
But I also hope that ten years later as well, your eyes will shine the
same way as they do today. That you will Keep the Spark alive, not only
through college, but through the next 2,500 weekends. And I hope not
just you, but my whole country will keep that spark alive, as we really
need it now more than any moment in history. And there is something
cool about saying - I come from the land of a billion sparks.

How to build a good Vocabulary ?

Be sure you have the communication
skills needed for a successful MBA

The Ten Best Vocabulary Learning Tips

• Step 1. Read, Read, Read! Most vocabulary words are learned from context. The more words you're exposed to, the better vocabulary you will have. While you read, pay close attention to words you don't know. First, try to figure out their meanings from context. Then look the words up. Read and listen to challenging material so that you'll be exposed to many new words.

• Step 2. Improve your context skills. Research shows that the vast majority of words are learned from context. To improve your context skills pay close attention to how words are used. Doing a search on a word using dejanews.com (for searching newsgroups) will give you many examples of how that word is used in context. Play our Daily Context Vocabulary Quiz.
  

• Step 3. Practice, practice, practice. Learning a word won't help very much if you promptly forget it. Research shows that it takes from 10 to 20 repetitions to really make a word part of your vocabulary. It helps to write the word - both the definition and a sentence you make up using the word - perhaps on an index card that can later be reviewed. As soon as you learn a new word, start using it. Review your index cards periodically to see if you have forgotten any of your new words. Also, do a search on a word using dejanews.com (for searching newsgroups) to get many examples of how the word is actually used.
  

• Step 4. Make up as many associations and connections as possible. Say the word aloud to activate your auditory memory. Relate the word to words you already know. For example, the word GARGANTUAN (very large) has a similar meaning to the words gigantic, huge, large, etc. You could make a sequence: small, medium, large, very large, GARGANTUAN. List as many things as you can that could be considered GARGANTUAN: Godzilla, the circus fat lady, the zit on your nose, etc. Create pictures of the word's meaning that involve strong emotions. Think "the GARGANTUAN creature was going to rip me apart and then eat me!"

• Step 5. Use mnemonics (memory tricks). For example, consider the word EGREGIOUS (extremely bad). Think EGG REACH US - imagine we've made a mistake so bad that they are throwing eggs at us and a rotten EGG REACHes US. Such funny little word pictures will help you remember what words mean, AND they are fun to make up. Also, find out which learning style suits you best. Everyone learns differently!

• Step 6. Get in the habit of looking up words you don't know. If you have a dictionary program on your computer, keep it open and handy. America Online and other internet services have dictionaries and thesauruses on their tool bars. Find them and look up any word you are not absolutely sure of. Use a thesaurus when you write to find the word that fits best.

• Step 7. Play with words. Play Scrabble, Boggle, and do crossword puzzles. These and other word games are available for the computer, so you are not dependent on a partner to play. Also, try out the Franklin Electronic Dictionary that features built-in word games.

• Step 8. Use vocabulary lists. For the serious vocabulary student, there are many books that focus on the words most commonly found in standardized tests, such as the SAT and GRE. There are also many interesting word sites on the Internet, many of which will send you a word a day by email.

• Step 9. Take vocabulary tests. Playing games, such as the ones on this site, that test your knowledge will help you learn new words and also let you know how much progress you're making. Offline sources for vocabulary tests include SAT prep books (we recommend "10 Real SATs" by ETS), and the Reader's Digest Wordpower section. For more, check out Amazon.com or your local bookseller.
  

• Step 10.Get excited about words! Come to appreciate the sometimes- subtle differences between them. Do you know the difference between something that denotes something else and something that connotes something else? If not, go look it up. Learn to say what you really mean and discover the joys of being able to express yourself in writing. Your future can depend on how rich your vocabulary is. A good vocabulary will make a difference on the standardized tests, like the SAT and GRE, that could determine whether or where you go to college. It will also determine the quality of your communication. So be in it for the long pull. Let building your vocabulary be a lifelong proposition. Remember: "In the beginning was the word." Until you have a word for something, it does not exist for you. Name it, and you have made your reality richer.
  

Thought leadership through management education

Management education represents a unique opportunity in the life of an individual to develop points of view that shape the professional and the type of individual she is





WHY has thought leadership become so important at this juncture in history? Every ideology and every system has fallen short, in some way or the other. While capitalism has brought growth and higher standards of living, it has also resulted in periodic instability and often increased inequalities. Socialism brought about greater equality and economic security, but lagged greatly in increasing the size of the pie. Authoritarian states have collapsed, but democracy has also not delivered results, at least quickly enough. So we have to live with huge contradictions: the worst of both worlds.
Thought leaders and thought leadership can broadly be segmented into five categories. The first kind of thought leaders, are those whose thoughts inspire, stoke passion, trigger a process of self-inquiry among the listeners. For instance, Rabindranath Tagore’s dream of an India: “Where the mind is without fear and the head is held high, where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls”.
Or Churchill who famously said: “Never give in — never, never, never, never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never give in except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force: never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy”.
And the finest text on thought leadership — the Bhagavad Gita. The Gita contains nuggets of knowledge that are invaluable to everyday living, living more fruitfully and optimally. It is much more about philosophy than religion and is universal in its applicability, across religions, cultures and countries. It explains vividly the concept of the mind and the intellect. How one needs to sharpen the intellect to control the mind. Or, how one’s attitude determines one’s altitude, how the past is history, the future is a mystery, the present is a gift, use it optimally by keeping the mind from drifting constantly into the past and the future.
The second kind of thought leadership is when through one’s own analysis and experience, a leader forms a framework of thinking to analyse a situation or to effectively sort data. Many years after it was first expounded, Maslow’s Theory of The Hierarchy of Needs continues to be an invaluable mental framework for understanding human behaviour and human motives. Porter’s theory of The Five Forces is perhaps one of the best methods to analyse the attractiveness of an industry and its key value drivers.
Third, are thought leaders who are proponents of an ideology that is contrarian to current thinking. The most striking example, Mahatma Gandhi, who countered the forces of violence with totally non-conventional ‘weapons’ — pacifism, moral suasion, fasting.
A recent example is C K Prahalad’s Bottom of the Pyramid concept that explains how to stop thinking of the poor as victims or as a burden and start recognising them as resilient and creative entrepreneurs and value conscious consumers.
Fourth, are thought leaders who through innovations, create product or
services that meet the needs of a consumer class, very often catering to needs that are unarticulated, but help improve productivity and effectiveness. As part of our quality and TQM process every year, we receive suggestions from shop-floor workers that are amazingly innovative. It is gratifying to see that some of these suggestions result in crores of savings on an annual recurring basis, without requiring major investments. I believe, the worker who has gone beyond the call of duty to find solutions to practical problems in his area of work, is in every way a thought leader.
And fifth, is that thought leadership that is put to use for altruistic purposes. An example that fascinates me is the Jaipur foot organisation which makes artificial limbs for the disabled. It has transformed the lives of millions by providing artificial limbs at an incredibly low cost.
Having etched this background, I offer a few initial deductions. First, thought leadership is not necessarily a result of education, an example of that is G D Birla, my great-grandfather who, with little formal education himself, was a great educationist and the founder of BITS-Pilani. Another example is that of Dhirubhai Ambani. Second, it is not restricted to a few fields of work or walks of life or to any section of society. It is universal and sector agnostic.
That, takes us to the moot question, “does management education foster thought leadership”? I believe that management education and management educators can facilitate thought leadership in a number of ways. The most significant manner is by the way they conceptualise and think about management education itself and the way they prepare their students, through their curriculum, assignments, projects, question papers, methods of evaluation and above all through the insights they bring into the classroom. Also, management educators must believe that management impacts and applies to every area wherever resources are used and therefore, it goes well beyond corporates and industry, and thought leadership
across all areas of work. As Professor Donald Haider of Kellogg’s Business School says, “the universe of hospitals and universities, opera and orchestra companies, family service agencies and religious organisations, soup kitchens, environmental advocacies and civil rights organisations” are all a crucial part of our economic, social and civic life. In a situation like this, it is incomprehensible to see management or management education restricted to corporates and industries alone.
Management education usually focuses on building a professional — a brand manager, an investment banker, a financial analyst, or a market researcher. But a thought leader is not just a professional. She is a person who is aware of the context in which she works, is sensitive to society’s concerns, deeply cares about the well-being of all and has an intensely personal point of view about what can and needs to be done. It is the powerful combination of the professional and the person that stimulates thought leadership. You rarely see a thought leader without a deeply human core. Management education represents a unique opportunity in the life of an individual to develop points of view that shape the professional and can potentially shape the type of individual she is.
However, my own strong belief is that management education cannot by itself create thought leaders. Management education can play a role to an extent and no further. It provides information, ensures a minimum development of understanding, ensures a whole lot of mental gymnastics. But converting that information, refining it to knowledge and then intuition, is left entirely to the student.
Going further, to be a thought leader is entirely left to the initiative and drive of the seeker, the student. Thought leadership requires passion, commitment to a cause, the conviction in one’s beliefs. It requires the ability to train oneself to become an outstanding leader — through understanding one’s strengths and honing them, and one’s weaknesses and working on
them relentlessly. It calls for discipline, and most times for personal sacrifice. It calls for focus, patience. To get to be the best in class, you need to work at it. Daily. Consistently. Passionately.
It entails an attempt to achieve personal mastery. It requires a good human being. Very importantly, it requires facing and letting go of one’s fears and self-limiting beliefs. As Lord Chesterfield said, “it is not possible to discover new oceans, unless one is willing to lose sight of the shore”. All of this calls for personal conviction, stretching beyond imagination, a strong personal desire to make a difference.
Can this be taught through management education? I believe it can’t.
But there is a crying need for thought leadership — be it the fields of polity, bureaucracy, industry, NGOs, media, what have you. It is upon us as a country to work collaboratively and create the social environment and infrastructure to foster thought leadership. It’s time to take charge of one’s own destiny as a country.
Whilst several western economies have begun to age, we in India, have a demographic advantage. From now up until 2050, we will have the largest number of young working people in the world. Can this resource become an advantage for India, if it is bereft of thought leaders? I believe it cannot.
(The author is chairman, Aditya Birla Group)


Kumar Mangalam Birla

How to Find Things to Do in a Boring Class

Let's face it: school is a drag. It might seem hard, even impossible, survive a day of school, but with this guide, you can make it easier on yourself.

Steps

1. Sleeping is an option, but teachers will notice after a while. If you do decide to do this, try and hide yourself behind a book, or stay in the back of the room.
2. Do homework from another class. That way, you won't go home having to worry about the loads of homework awaiting you.
3. Draw or Doodle things on note book paper in the margins of notes: Cartoons, shapeless blobs, and anything else that tickles your fancy.. These look like harmless things to teachers and chances are they will not punish you for these things. Just remember to write everything on the board just in case the info was important. Sometimes, if you sit far away from the teacher and tilt your notebook up, it will just look like you are taking notes. Glance up at the teacher every so often so it seems like you are paying attention and writing down everything.
4. Zone out, but try and remember the last sentence your teacher said, just in case your teacher asks you to prove you were listening. Some people develop a talent of having one ear listen to what the teacher says, but think about something else entirely. Then, if the teacher calls on you, announces important information, or the class reacts to some exciting - or not so exciting - news, ("There's a test tomorrow", or "No homework!") you can replay what you just heard with one ear, and you won't have missed anything.
5. Read magazines or novels, because they're often better reads than your textbook. Hide the magazine behind the book, but figure out a way to disguise it if your teacher makes rounds of the classroom.
6. Pass notes or send text messages. Remember to put your phone on silent - if you put it on vibrate, people WILL hear (for most phones).
7. Chew gum, or suck on hard candy. You'll still have to listen to the lessons, but you can have all sorts of fun manipulating the treat inside your mouth.
8. Do Origami. Get a piece of paper and fold stuff.
9. Look for loose change in your pockets. It's surprising how fun a quarter can be- flip it to answer true or false questions, Flick the coin so it spins, think about the next arcade game you are going to play with the quarter, etc.
10. Play video games like the hand held things such as a graphing calculator, nintendo ds, or psp. Make sure to hide these behind folders because the ds and psp are obviously a game while the graphing calculators are less obvious. Keep in mind that if caught the teacher may confiscate it so you should use at your own risk.

Tips

• If passing notes, fold as tiny as possible.
• If you are stuck reading something boring, try putting it to a tune or a rap... just don't actually start singing out loud!
• Quarters hitting desks can be noisy. Flip with caution.
• Sometimes teachers will be nice and give you a warning for playing games in class.
• If passing notes, and you have a mechanical pencil, write the note on a small piece of paper and put it inside the pencil. then, pass the pencil to a friend who knows the note is in there. He can then open it and read it, and reply with another note, etc. That way when you are passing it and the teacher sees you, you can just say "I was just letting him borrow my pencil". Also see about learning morse code and using that.

Warnings

• Most schools don't allow gum, so make sure the teacher doesn't see your jaw moving.
• If you are caught by the teacher doing homework from another class, the teacher may consider it as cheating, and may confinscate the HW.
• If the teacher catches your note, they might read it in front of the class. Make sure it contains no profanity, and that you'd have no problem if your grandmother read it. Don't gossip or down talk anyone, because if your teacher reads it aloud, you could have people mad at you.
• Do not do this all the time, as school matters. Maybe not now, but it sure will when you go applying for jobs.
• Origami folding is loud, so do at your own risk!

How to Be Confident in Starting New Things

Everyone is a little shy at first when starting something new. But with a little help, you can get over your fears, and become confident.

Steps

1. Do some soothing exercises to calm your nerves, before starting this new activity. For example, write down all the things you have done, or are looking forward to. You could write about a vacation coming up, or getting your crush to like you, etc. Put these on a scrap sheet of paper and put them in a pocket or bag.
2. Meditate. Sit in a comfy place where you have had previous experiences with something good. Throw open a window, close your eyes and get in a comfortable position. Meditation does not mean saying "om." It means relaxing.
3. Make a good impression, when you arrive at your destination. You want other people thinking that you are a kind person. You can do this by Saying Hello to people who seem to want to be friends. Remember to smile a lot, too.
4. Enjoy yourself! Once you do that, time will fly by!

Tips

If you can't seem to have a good time, then try talking to the owner or your parents about stopping. You shouldn't do any activities if they're not fun.

Warnings

Don't go overboard when making a good impression. You'll scare people!

How to Make People Think You Are Confident

Steps

1. Ask questions of any kind. Sometimes asking silly questions is the best way to boost confidence, and people greatly admire those who show no fear of being judged. You have nothing to prove to anyone; be silly, be spontaneous, have fun conversations. These are really good ways to prove to others that you are confident.
2. Hold your head up high. Have tall, straight posture.
3. Make eye contact. Don't look down or from side to side.
4. When shaking hands, have a firm grip, but not too firm!
5. Speak loud and clear. Think before you speak so you have a clear idea of what to say. If you tend to jumble words in an attempt to rush through what you're saying, slow down.
6. Smile. Always show your pearly whites.
   

   If you look like this (yes, it's silly, but you get the idea), then people have no choice but to believe in you, because they know that you believe in yourself!
7. Laugh. Make it look like you are always having fun. Laugh at your mistakes, you'll seem more happy.
8. Keep busy. Don't just stand around. Meet new people. Share a funny joke, join clubs, do social things.
9. Take compliments gracefully by always smiling and saying a simple "thank you." If someone pays you a compliment, do not respond by putting yourself down.
10. Be honest. People like you more if they feel they're able to trust you and you are able to trust yourself.
11. Appreciate yourself for who you are. Acting in a confident manner will make you appear to be more confident, but it's also important to find value in yourself as an individual. This will give you real confidence. You are someone special, you have a beautiful smile, and you're good at lots of things! Make a list of these things for yourself, and remind yourself often of your great qualities.

Tips

• Don't try to impress people. The best advice anyone can ever give you is to live your own life. The harder you try to impress people the more unimpressed they'll become. Nobody admires the kiss up. Just go about your business and your social life will fall into place.
  • Remember, even if you do not feel confident, no one else knows it. Fake it until you make it. Pretend to be confident and eventually you will.
• Remember to always look your best and feel good. Taking good care of yourself is important to your well-being. Your hygiene, attire, and attitude are very important parts of who you are, and you should keep these things healthy. By taking care of yourself, these actions will tell your mind that you are special and valuable, and this, in turn, will truly make you confident in yourself.
• Act like you don't care what other people think, even if you do. Acting like yourself will lead to full confidence.
• Remember that your honest concern, your innate convictions and the fountain of vitality within you always reach and enter the hearts of people. It is because of your own attachment to pettiness and superficial glamor and glitter that you underestimate yourself. So be sure that if you do soul searching and act accordingly people will surely think that you are confident. [Cf: Smiling Sun: Dr. Shriniwas Kashalikar]
• Sometimes when you act confident people get jealous and try to do what you do. Take this as a tip that what you are doing is working.

Warnings

• Do not be too loud, obnoxious or demanding. That is a turn off for many people.
• Don't cling to people and make them do all the leg work in a conversation. This will make them feel like you're dispensable
• Do not try arbitrarily to "make others think" that you are "confident". That will make people think, feel, and confirm that you are ridiculous rather than confident.
• Don't ever let anyone tell you you're not good enough because they're not any better.
• Don't over do the smiling. Some people say you have to smile all the time but that can come off as kind of creepy. Just do what comes naturally and smile at appropriate times.
• Don't be discouraged if you can't follow certain steps such as step #2 for instance. You don't have to have perfect posture to be respected.

How to Feel Confident

Steps

1. Take a public speaking course. You might dread getting up in front of people, but there's no better way to jump start your confident feelings than by assuring yourself that you've got something to say, and people are listening
2. Change up your look. Whether you're male or female, getting a new outfit and haircut can make you feel fresh, cool and confident.
3. Pretend that you are already confident. If you've ever wanted to be an actor, use that motivation now. You may know you're capable and competent, yet you may feel rather insecure, but by pretending that you're already confident, you might be able to convince yourself. Ask yourself, what would the confident me do? How would they walk? How would they speak? Practice!
4. Find some affirmations that will help you and repeat them often to yourself.
5. Affirmations are very powerful and need to be spoken as though they have already happened. Say to yourself "I am a very confident person", "There is nothing I cannot do if I put my mind to it".
6. Visualize yourself being congratulated on something you dream to achieve, imagine the person shaking your hand and saying well done. Hold a picture of you being successful.
7. Every evening, just before you go to bed, think to yourself at least ten times, 'I am a confident man/woman'. This leaves a positive frame of mind inside yourself and will make you feel more confident the next day.

Tips

• Smile and relax; there's nothing that needs to be worried about.
• Don't feel that the audience is expecting a lot from you.
• Assume yourself equal to anyone in the audience.
• Volunteer important works in your organization, this is how you can earn people's respect.
• ALWAYS be honest and believe in yourself. If you don't no one else will.
• Don't underestimate yourself just because you're younger or smaller.
• If anybody puts you down or makes fun of you, think it through and how silly the comment is. Make it feel like it's a joke and you won't take the comment seriously.
• Not feeling confident is sometimes associated with a petty intellectual paradigm that stimulates our autonomic nervous activity which in turn affects our feelings of self-worth. This paradigm can be overcome and you can blossom from within by studying and re-evaluating yourself. [Cf: Smiling Sun: Dr. Shriniwas Kashalikar]

Warnings

• It is not correct to get obsessed and depressed by "Not feeling confident".
• Blind belief and fanatic diposition can make one feel confident. But that can be disasterous.
• Hence rather than making frantic effrots to "somehow feel confident" explore and care for your true self. Your true self is noble and dignified. Exploring and caring for your true self will ensure revitalization and the natural and full fledged emergence of feeling of confidence [Cf: Stress: Understanding and Management: Dr. Shriniwas Kashalikar]

How to Be Confident

Steps

1. Make a list of special talents you have, or things you do that are good—morally or otherwise. Focusing on your attributes helps distract you from those parts of yourself that you think are flawed. It doesn't have to be a specific skill or activity either; it can be an approach or an attitude that you champion through life. Do you always stay calm, cool and collected, even in harried situations? Are you very patient with people? Do you always see the humorous side of things? Are you always there for your friends?
2. Find your passion. Whether it's baton twirling, martial arts, classic cars, or basket weaving, you will feel confident pursuing that endeavor by recognizing what you enjoy doing the most. More importantly, you'll be enjoying your progress.
3. Choose a role model, whether someone close to you, or someone famous. Think of the qualities that the role model displays, whether physical, emotional, moral, and/or spiritual. Work towards acquiring those.
4. Don't think about yourself too much. Try not to focus negatively on how you come across or how others may perceive you. Instead, focus more on making other people happy, and that will build your confidence as other people start enjoying your company.
5. Accept compliments gracefully. Don't roll your eyes and say, "Yeah, right," or shrug it off. Take it to heart and respond positively ("Thank you" and a smile works well).
6. Know that you have important things to say and do. When you feel strongly about something, speak loudly and clearly and make eye contact with people. Be yourself.
7. Take care of yourself. Eat a healthy diet and get enough exercise. Don't abuse your body, don't overload it, and don't deny it any of the things it needs. At the same time, don't obsess. Buying all the moisturizers, creams and conditioners will not bring you closer to who you want to be. Those things are only band-aids and make up. Confidence comes from within. Take the time to reflect on your life and do some emotional maintenance. In order to be confident, you must value yourself and understand that your well-being is important.
8. Stick up for yourself. If people put you down (and not in a good-natured, joking way), then let them know that their opinion of you is not held by everyone--most of all yourself. This may, at first, be hard to do. But once you stick up for yourself a few times, your confidence builds and you get more adept at it.
9. Celebrate your individuality. If you know you've got something special or different, then embrace it—don't hide it! That's diversity! You may wish that you were taller, or shorter, skinnier, stronger, whatever the case may be. But you need to realize that, if you were like everyone else, then you wouldn't be who you are. "What am I?" you ask; the answer's easy: You're a unique individual who is capable of growing and learning.
10. Take action. It is surprising how powerful the simple step of taking an action can be. And the action you take need not be something extravagant or grand. It could be something as simple as tackling a task that you have been procrastinating, such as writing a letter or tidying up that corner of the garage that has been out of control for the last several months. It could also be something as interesting as taking a class in yoga, art, interior design, anything that interests you that you haven't done yet. Whether large or small, action brings with it exhilaration, enthusiasm, and the confidence that other things can be done as well.
11. Find a song that you love! Such as Drive My Car by The Beatles or So Much Love by The Rocket Summer, and walk to the beat. Sing it in your head if you're feeling insecure.
12. Make a blog. Blogs are a great way to publish your thoughts and opinions on the Internet. Make it anonymous if you would like. It's completely your choice. But have fun with your topics and just be confident with what you write. Be careful though, and don't write anything about others that you wouldn't want them to find! Happy blogging.

Tips

• Don't compare yourself with other people. It is a wasteful pursuit, and you could be doing something better with your time and energy. Know what you, personally, want and expect from yourself, and focus on attaining those things. The things that you want and expect from yourself don't have anything to do with how you measure up to others.
• Consider attending leadership classes. Learn to take control of things. If you are in school, then consider running for a social position, such as a president of a club. The ability to lead others and respond to others' behavior under your leadership will help to bring you self confidence.
• Listen to your inner monologue—your inner voice. In situations where you believe you lack confidence, realize that your inner voice is telling you negative things. You need to retrain that inner voice to be positive in those situations. If you need help, find someone who can help you do that.
• Speak positively at all times. When you hear yourself saying something negative about yourself, instantly replace it with a positive comment.
• You have to reprogram your subconscious by repeatedly telling it how confident you are; it will believe you in time.
• Know where you are going and follow through.
• Don't feel shy when talking to a stranger. Smile while you talk, as that will make you feel confident.
• No matter how you look, feel good about yourself from within. This attitude will make you confident.
• Walk 20% faster than your normal pace, stand and walk with your spine straight and hold your chin high. This physical posture will force you to think positive and be confident.
• These wonderful tips can be practiced if you pay attention to your innate faculties. Thus boost your kindness, consideration, empathy, exuberance, generosity, curiosity, concern, forgiveness, convictions by suitable actions. This is possible through caring for your true self. [Cf: Superliving: Dr. Shriniwas Kashalikar]

Warnings

• Don't put yourself down. Everyone is different and has a valuable contribution to make to a diverse society. You are important for the person you are.
• Don't stop yourself from doing what you want to do as long as it doesn't harm you or others.
• Remember that there is a fine line between confidence and arrogance. Be careful not to portray a pompous or cocky attitude.
• Never excuse your virtues. For example, don't say, "Sorry for being here on time" when your friend is not ready.
• A lot of the time, peer pressure is to blame for lack of confidence. Some peer pressure is good, but never give in if you feel it's wrong. Trust yourself.
• Sometimes a person will compliment you just to get something. Depending on the situation/person, the "something" can be anything from money to a night out. Don't be a cynic, but don't be gullible. (Trust in your instincts. They are usually right!)
• Never let negative people, ones who always cry about everything in their lives or those who point out the smallest flaws in you with intention to hurt you, tell you anything. Most people do this when they know that you are better than them.
• Don't expect these steps to work overnight. Confidence must gradually be developed by a pattern of positive thinking and action; it can't be faked. (Unless your ENTJ, then it can be faked, but only for a short period of time.)

How to Build Self Confidence

Steps

1. Recognize your insecurities. What does that voice in the back of your mind say? What makes you ashamed of yourself? This could be anything from acne, to regrets, to emotional abuse (past or present) from a loved one or friends at school. Whatever is making you feel unworthy, ashamed, or inferior, identify it, give it a name, and write it down.
2. Talk about it with friends and loved ones. Wear it on your sleeve. Each day you should chip away at it; wear it down. There's no quick fix. Get to the root of the problem; focus on it and understand that you need to resolve each issue before you can move on.
3. Remember that no one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in any of our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality. Learn that life is full of bumps down the road.
4. Identify your successes. Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.
5. Be thankful for what you have. A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.
6. Be Positive, even if you don't feel positive. Avoid self-pity, or the pity and sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior--they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others. By doing so, you reinforce those ideas in your mind and encourage your growth in a positive direction.
7. Look in the mirror and smile. Studies surrounding what's called the "facial feedback theory" suggest that the expressions on your face can actually encourage your brain to register certain emotions. So by looking in the mirror and smiling every day, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run.
8. 

   I am gorgeous, huh?
   Fake it. Along the same lines of smiling to make yourself feel happy, acting confident might actually make you believe it. Pretend you're a completely confident version of you; go through the motions and see how you feel.
9. Express yourself, whether it's through art, music, writing, etc. Find something you enjoy. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. If it's difficult to name two or three things you have some ability in or just plain love to do, think about things others do that you would like to do too and take some lessons or join an enthusiasts club. When you're following your passion, not only will it have a therapeutic effect, but you'll feel unique and accomplished, all of which can help build your self confidence. Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends!
10. Stick to your principles. It might be tough, but if you don't have something you can believe in, you don't have anything. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything. No matter what's happened in your life, you can always lay claim to the fact that from this day forward, you've followed your principles to the best of your ability.
11. Help others. When you know you're kind to the people around you, and are making a positive difference in other people's lives (even if it's just being kinder to the person who serves you coffee in the morning), you'll know that you are a positive force in the world--which will boost your self confidence. Go volunteer twice a month at an elementary school. Bake something for your neighbor for no reason. Confidence that you have earned is the most long-lasting.
12. Stop worrying. What worries you today will be forgotten by you and people around you tomorrow. Can you remember what you were so worried about the same day the same time last week? If not, then you should not worry right now. You will not worry about it even one week from now.

• Exercise and eat healthy. Exercise raises endorphins and makes one feel happier and healthier. It is certainly an easy and effective way to boost your self-confidence.
• When you're feeling superbly insecure, write down a list of things that are good about you. Then read the list back. You'd be surprised at what you can come up with.
• Turn feelings of envy or jealousy into a desire to achieve. Stop wanting what others have just because they have it; seek things simply because you want them, whether anybody else has them or not.
• Don't be afraid to push yourself a bit - a little bit of pressure can actually show just how good you are!
• Take a wilderness experience course such as those found at Outward Bound or NOLS. Learning how to survive in the wilderness will build your confidence in other areas of life too. You can also try taking a martial arts or fitness class/course (or both). This will help build confidence and strength.
• Try to make yourself talk positively at all times. When you hear yourself saying you can't do something, stop and say you can. Unless you try, you will never know whether you are able to or not.
• Everyone is beautiful in their own way; don't let anyone tell you differently. Remember to tell yourself that you are beautiful every day; even if you don't believe it, one day you will.
• Money, luck, beauty, and all other material things are just an illusion of happiness. It misleads us to believe we will feel excellent if we have these things or have fun, but in the long run, you will discover that while these things aren't necessarily horrible, they are only mere satisfactions. You will realize having the American Eagle jacket, Nike Shoes, or an attractively rich person flirting with you is only a satisfaction, so you in the end you might feel glad you've gotten what you wanted, but you'll want more and more until you reach happiness. It'll be you just running for happiness blindly until you are worn out.
• Happiness is not all about being lucky, attractive, or the best, but rather feeling joyful in yourself, letting go of your insecurities, and having real fun. Sometimes going clubbing is also what the media tags as being the most fun thing, and it can be, but you decide what feels wonderful and happily fun. The reason people also reflect back to their childhood as "the good ole days" is because that's when being the richest or prettiest doesn't count really, and when we were able to release ourselves and have true fun, feeling happy and confident.
• Keep smiling all the time. It will help you feel more confident.
• Say what comes to your mind; since your instinct thought of it, it's probably the right thing for you. Trusting your instinct will provide you with confidence to make the right decision at the right time.
• Practice good posture. Our body posture represents what we are at that particular time. A simple habit that we can learn and implement is to stand and sit correctly. Your proper body posture will speak for you; how you stand sends out a message to the world, and in turn, back to you.
• Avoid perfectionism. Perfectionism paralyzes you and keeps you from accomplishing your goals.
• Write something on wikiHow! If you have a suggestion for anything, then share it. You will feel good for contributing, helping someone, and having your voice heard.
• It is important that you take a oath everyday morning that you will do wonders today. Never think negative about yourself
• Self confidence is also about knowledge. Improve your knowledge on subjects which you feel interes

Warnings

• Don't get wrapped up in your mistakes and dwell on bad points; they can be a healthy contrast to your good points or even give you something to improve. There's no feeling like being good at something you were really bad at.
• Don't confuse what you have with who you are. People degrade their self worth when comparing possessions.
• Surround yourself with nurturing friends, not overly critical individuals who make you feel inadequate or insecure. This could do great harm and damage to your self confidence.
• Do not try to become confident in the sole interest of finding a partner. You will regret creating a false personality as the relationship goes along.
• It's good to have a lot of confidence, but don't build it up so much that you get egotistical and annoying.
• Lack of confidence is not necessarily a curse! So do not worry. Many ignorant, fanatic and maniac people are confident but is that desirable? No. Building self confidence should be associated with simultaneous growth from within. Thus by overcoming pettiness and superficiality you can build unshakable self confidence [Cf: Conceptual Stress: Dr. Shriniwas Kashalikar].
• Do not mistake being loud and cocky as confidence. Often this is just a way of somebody with lots of insecurities to cover it up, therefore not being confident at all. Confidence is being happy with yourself and not allowing what other people think of you to affect you, you should only care about what you think of yourself.