Chanakya Quotes

“A person should not be too honest.
Straight trees are cut first
And Honest people are screwed first.”

“Even if a snake is not poisonous,
It should pretend to be venomous.”

“The biggest guru-mantra is: Never share your secrets with anybody. ! It will destroy you.”

“There is some self-interest behind every friendship.
There is no Friendship without self-interests.
This is a bitter truth.”

“Before you start some work, always ask yourself three questions – Why am I doing it, What the results might be and Will I be successful. Only when you think deeply
And find satisfactory answers to these questions, go ahead.”

“As soon as the fear approaches near, attack and destroy it.”

“Once you start a working on something,
Don’t be afraid of failure and
Don’t abandon it.
People who work sincerely are the happiest.”

“The fragrance of flowers spreads
Only in the direction of the wind.
But the goodness of a person spreads in all direction.”

“A man is great by deeds, not by birth.”

“Treat your kid like a darling for the first five years.
For the next five years, scold them.
By the time they turn sixteen, treat them like a friend.
Your grown up children are your best friends.”

“Books are as useful to a stupid person
As a mirror is useful to a blind person.”

“Education is the best friend.
An educated person is respected everywhere.
Education beats the beauty and the youth.”

Don't copy if you can't paste

A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. He Said: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!”. The audience was in silence and shock. The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!"

Laughter and applause.

A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home.

He was a bit foggy after a drink. He said loudly to his wife who was preparing dinner, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!"

The wife went; "ah!" with shock and rage.

Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, the manager finally blurted out"...and I can't remember who she was!"

By the time the manager regained his consciousness, he was on a hospital bed nursing burns from boiling water.

Moral of the story: Don't copy if you can't paste!

Why English Is a Funny Language?!!!

In what other language do people drive in a parkway and park in a driveway?

Why does night fall but never break and day break but never fall?

Why is it that when we transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when we transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

Why are people who ride motorcycles called bikers and people who ride bikes called cyclists?

In what other language do they call the third hand on the clock the second hand?

Why is it called a TV set when you get only one?

Why - in our crazy language - can your nose run and your feet smell?

Sometimes you have to believe that all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane:

If olive oil is made of olives, what do they make baby oil from?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian consume?

A writer is someone who writes, and a stinger is something that stings.

But fingers don't fing and grocers don't groce.

If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of booth be beeth?

If the teacher taught, why isn't it also true that the preacher praught?

If harmless actions are the opposite of harmful actions, why are shameless and shameful behavior the same?

English is a language in which you can turn a light on and you can turn a light off and you can turn a light out, but you can't turn a light in;

In which the sun comes up and goes down, but prices go up and come down.

In which your nose can simultaneously burn up and burn down and your car can slow up and slow down, in which you can fill in a form by filling out a form and in which your alarm clock goes off by going on.

English is a crazy language. What is it that when the sun or the moon or the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible; and why when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I shall end it?

Tricky Plurals
============ ===

We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;

but the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.

One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,

yet the plural of moose should never be meese.

You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;

yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.

If the plural of man is always called men,

why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?

If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,

and I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?

If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,

why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?

Then one may be that, and three would be those,

yet hat in the plural would never be hose,

and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.

We speak of a brother and also of brethren,

but though we say mother, we never say methren.

Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, but imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Lets face it, English is a crazy language!

Farmer's Donkey (A heart touching lesson)

If a truth gun were put to our collective TV heads asking why we watch American Idol, and The Apprentice, the answer might be: we like watching people being humiliated. If that's true -- then how come there is a sub-set of Reality TV that can only be described as Shame TV because it uses humiliation as its core appeal. Sure, talent shows like American Idol have been around since radio starting with The Original Amateur Hour with Major Bowes. What is different about Idol is that this talent search is more about the losers than the winners. Like its forerunners, we do cheer for the powerful singer. But aren't we really waiting for Simon, Paula and Randy to rip into some over-eager, untalented hopeful who actually volunteered himself for public degradation?

We root for the neo-executives on The Apprentice. But aren't we really waiting for the last three minutes when the strange man with the orange-coloured, vinyl hair utters "You’re fired" through his pouty lips?

We can't seem to get enough of these debase-me-now shows. To this brand of Shame TV is now added the remarkable Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew, a one hour plunge into human abasement on VH1. The show says it chronicles "... the dramatic, unscripted real life experiences of a group of actual celebrities as they make the life-changing decision to enter themselves into a drug, alcohol and addiction treatment program with the sincere desire to achieve true rehabilitation and recovery."

To make sure we get the 'redeeming value' part, VH1 surrounds the show with visuals that ask viewers to "Watch and Discuss". Sure, but what we're liable to discuss is the decomposition of former Taxi TV star, Jeff Conaway, as he quivers with delirium tremors, shrieks with withdrawal pain and screams obscenities at his fellow rehabbers. Or we'll discuss a former porn star and her friend's demonstration of their considerable flatulence and belching skills while waiting for group therapy. On the Richter scale, this show is a 9.5.

To be sure, we feel Dr. Drew Pinsky's compassion as he tends to the healing process of these unfortunates. The show producers can claim they serve the public interest by showing how the addiction treatment process works. Of course, they could also put the show on WebMD.com, or some appropriate health outlet, for those specific folks who really need it. But they put it on TV. This show is entertainment, not a documentary. VH1 is interested in our eyes and ears. They know we are there to watch the train wreck, not the clean-up.

The first mystery is why so many people are willing to debase themselves in front of all of us? As for Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew, it's an extraordinary level of self-abasement, says Stuart Fischoff, Ph.D., Senior Editor at "The Journal of Media Psychology." It's being "pathetic as a career move, like grabbing onto a sewer pipe" he says about Celebrity Rehab's cast list.

Okay, that may explain the folks who go on these shows. But how do we account for why millions of us watch them? Its social comparison, explains Dr. Elliot Aronson, psychologist, Professor Emeritus, University of California at Santa Cruz and author of “Mistakes Were Made But Not By Me”- “Why We Justify Bad Decisions?” We evaluate ourselves in comparison with other people. "It's a balm to our self-esteem," he says. He believes we look at the loser contestants on Idol saying I'm better than that. I would never do that and look what happens to people who do that.

So we watch to feel better about ourselves -- got it. But there is a more disturbing angle to this and its name is 'schadenfreude', meaning we take pleasure from someone else's misfortune -- which is why slipping on a banana peel gets laughs. Clinical psychologist Dr. Geoffrey White, a Los Angeles-based consultant to Reality TV producers, calls this the current zeitgeist, the spirit of our times. In times like these, he believes, when Americans are feeling unsettled, uncertain and powerless, there is comfort, indeed enjoyment, in seeing other people suffer. We don't feel so alone. "Shame is the most disturbing emotion. We can identify with the people doing the humiliation without feeling responsible for it," he explains. Watching others being humiliated, it would appear, is helpful -- to the watchers.

None of us wants to believe we actually like seeing others humiliated. That's not part of our supposedly compassionate belief systems. Yet, our culture is shaped by the content of our media and our media is shaped by the content of our culture, so how do we account for this coarsening of our culture, this growth of Shame TV? Is this really the true spirit of our times?

THE 4 WIVES

There was a rich merchant who had 4 wives. He loved the 4th wife the most and adorned her with rich robes and treated her to delicacies. He took great care of her and gave her nothing but the best.

He also loved the 3rd wife very much. He's very proud of her and always wanted to show off her to his friends. However, the merchant is always in great fear that she might run away with some other men.

He too, loved his 2nd wife. She is a very considerate person, always patient and in fact is the merchant's confidante. Whenever the merchant faced some problems, he always turned to his 2nd wife and she would always help him out and tide him through difficult times.

Now, the merchant's 1st wife is a very loyal partner and has made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and business as well as taking care of the household. However, the merchant did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her.

One day, the merchant fell ill. Before long, he knew that he was going to die soon. He thought of his luxurious life and told himself, "Now I have 4 wives with me. But when I die, I'll be alone. How lonely I'll be!"

Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I loved you most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No way!" replied the 4th wife and she walked away without another word.

The answer cut like a sharp knife right into the merchant's heart. The sad merchant then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you so much for all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!" replied the 3rd wife. "Life is so good over here! I'm going to remarry when you die!" The merchant's heart sank and turned cold.

He then asked the 2nd wife, "I always turned to you for help and you've always helped me out. Now I need your help again. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" replied the 2nd wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave." The answer came like a bolt of thunder and the merchant was devastated.

Then a voice called out : "I'll leave with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go." The merchant looked up and there was his first wife. She was so skinny, almost like she suffered from malnutrition. Greatly grieved, the merchant said, "I should have taken much better care of you while I could have !"

Actually, we all have 4 wives in our lives

a. The 4th wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die.

b. Our 3rd wife ? Our possessions, status and wealth. When we die, they all go to others.

c. The 2nd wife is our family and friends. No matter how close they had been there for us when we're alive, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave.

d. The 1st wife is in fact our soul, often neglected in our pursuit of material, wealth and sensual pleasure.

Guess what? It is actually the only thing that follows us wherever we go. Perhaps it's a good idea to cultivate and strengthen it now rather than to wait until we're on our deathbed to lament

A letter

Ballou was an American patriot who immediately and voluntarily left his career and family and enlisted in the Union army when the Civil War commenced. A week before Bull Run, a battle in which he would be killed, Sullivan penned this love letter to his wife Sarah. Read over the words slowly and take in what a true man’s love sounds like:
July the 14th, 1861
Washington D.C.
My very dear Sarah:
The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days-perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write you again, I feel impelled to write lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more.
Our movement may be one of a few days duration and full of pleasure-and it may be one of severe conflict and death to me. Not my will, but thine O God, be done. If it is necessary that I should fall on the battlefield for my country, I am ready. I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in, the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans upon the triumph of the Government, and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution. And I am willing-perfectly willing-to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt.
But, my dear wife, when I know that with my own joys I lay down nearly all of yours, and replace them in this life with cares and sorrows-when, after having eaten for long years the bitter fruit of orphanage myself, I must offer it as their only sustenance to my dear little children-is it weak or dishonorable, while the banner of my purpose floats calmly and proudly in the breeze, that my unbounded love for you, my darling wife and children, should struggle in fierce, though useless, contest with my love of country?
I cannot describe to you my feelings on this calm summer night, when two thousand men are sleeping around me, many of them enjoying the last, perhaps, before that of death-and I, suspicious that Death is creeping behind me with his fatal dart, am communing with God, my country, and thee.
I have sought most closely and diligently, and often in my breast, for a wrong motive in thus hazarding the happiness of those I loved and I could not find one. A pure love of my country and of the principles have often advocated before the people and “the name of honor that I love more than I fear death” have called upon me, and I have obeyed.
Sarah, my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me to you with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly on with all these chains to the battlefield.
The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and to you that I have enjoyed them so long. And hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when God willing, we might still have lived and loved together and seen our sons grow up to honorable manhood around us. I have, I know, but few and small claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me-perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Edgar-that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed. If I do not, my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battlefield, it will whisper your name.
Forgive my many faults, and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless and foolish I have often been! How gladly would I wash out with my tears every little spot upon your happiness, and struggle with all the misfortune of this world, to shield you and my children from harm. But I cannot. I must watch you from the spirit land and hover near you, while you buffet the storms with your precious little freight, and wait with sad patience till we meet to part no more.
But, O Sarah! If the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you; in the garish day and in the darkest night-amidst your happiest scenes and gloomiest hours-always, always; and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath; or the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.
Sarah, do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again.
As for my little boys, they will grow as I have done, and never know a father’s love and care. Little Willie is too young to remember me long, and my blue-eyed Edgar will keep my frolics with him among the dimmest memories of his childhood. Sarah, I have unlimited confidence in your maternal care and your development of their characters. Tell my two mothers his and hers I call God’s blessing upon them. O Sarah, I wait for you there! Come to me, and lead thither my children.
Sullivan